Whatsoever resemblance to any living or whosoever dead is INTENSE-NULL

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Jinxed for lifetime

It’s no more about a drop in the ocean. Contamination is what I see in the first place. Fatal diseases, as we already have conquered many, have been replaced by the hive of terror. Death is no more painful but instant.
They kill thirty-eight; we shall kill three hundred eight. The process of retaliation has and will never cease to exist. It is highly chronic and shall continue to haunt until each one of us perish again for the best. A fresh start, rekindled with hope and kindness. It shall be the ground of new experiments for His latest technology on life. But as it is the destiny of every civilization, it will also find its flaws and peak like hell to wrap up for the next. It does not have to be Moscow or Mumbai or New York. It could be ‘Sea-bed vs. Troposphere’ or ‘Milky Way vs. Andromeda’.

Oh…..now, don’t turn pessimistic. I do not intend to talk you into it. It is the nature that I described. Liven up! There is lot more happiness than you tried so far. The government is doing its job, not well enough though. Resources too have to be conserved, right?     

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Late begun than never begun

Gates Foundation, as we all know, encourages innovation in science and technology and bio-technology, and recently, it got into social and cultural changes as well. The Philosophy of Giving back to the society is in picture now. Rightly said…..where there is a Bill, there is a way.

The founders, Bill and Melinda, have made a commitment to exhaust all the amassed wealth. Unsurprisingly, it will take 50 years after the last of the two die. On the top of it is the Berkshire Gift announced by Warren Buffet. So, the raised funding has blatantly widened the ambit of this great initiative to improve rural and urban health in India.

As of now, the target set is bringing down the unacceptably high death rates for children less than five years of age in Uttar Pradesh and Bihar. Refer, The Hindu dated March 29. Kicked off well but they have miles to go. The fortune thus put to some sensible use.

Best wishes!!!        

Monday, March 29, 2010

The NEW me

After the tragic incident of March 25, I have now reduced the study hours drastically. I actually had forgotten that I studied, oops…..was registered, for four years in NIT Jamshedpur. As of now, all the vigour is lost, patience is spilled out and the best part, acumen is rusted.

So, here is the new me. A blog every evening (mostly), a comedy movie before going to bed and lots of chatting scattered in bits. This way I am relaxed but the burden has, in fact, been piling up. While I am finding my new lifestyle irresistible, I am also worried I might have to gallop towards the end of April. 23rd May, kindly delay your coming.

Looking forward to your kind consideration.

Thanks but disregards.
Nikhil Bhaskar

By the way, do you think Ms. Witness Gupta is a partner in crime and that she should be punished as well? Your VOTE is entirely your responsibility. Put it in comments.           

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Deadly Day-bid

He walked in the broad daylight, charted all possible soft targets and executed his plans. On the contrary, we slept like never before, guarded only in-land (read, Operation Grin-hunt) and failed to stop this man twice and God only knows how many yet to be revealed.

But, here’s the good news. The meanistry is stretching out to gain access to the man in discussion. A formal communication would be routed through official channels, refer The Hindu dated March 27, and be sent, although in the next week, to the concerned department of the sister-victim (read, 9/11) country.

Don’t you think such a snail paced work isn’t a relief for those who lost their kith and kin? So for the time being, you can either ensconce in your swivel chair or raise your voice to expedite the proceedings. Be it 26/11 or German Bakery, common people have been the sufferers and only promises are made in the name of justice.

To remind you, recent times have seen people and social organizations swaying RTI as a tool which, over the years, has grown mightier than the pen (read, the media). Although times change and block-holes are countered (read, Amendment seeking proposals for the Act). But then, we should not be the mock spectators of despair and sorrow. What say you?

Saturday, March 27, 2010

from ARTH to EARTH..... it's been a while

Finally, it is Earth’s turn. Till date since Chanakya wrote his masterpiece, it was only Arth’s turn. Sprinting and smarting in this madness, people forgot long back what it is to live in peace. Short sightedness took each one of us by storm and we now face a situation that’s only going to worsen every passing day.
So, today will be observed the Earth’s hour from 8.30 p.m. to 9.30 p.m. A global urge for co-operation to combat the aftermath of Climate Change and save jet-fast exhausting non-renewable resources. I am just anxious to know what will happen to the nuclear reactors during this hour? If they are shut down, call it feigning or gained conscientiousness, how much will it cost to restart them? So, I googled. Pretty much obvious, isn’t it? Here is your answer.
Hmmm.....can’t these fools spare little for the poor people? There are many.....have a look. Call it anything, political or corporate or humane responsibility.....but then, it will cost them another Hiroshima-Nagasaki. Not everyone gains conscientiousness at the same time. ;)
Good bye. Dimaag ki batti jalane ka time ho gaya. Time to darken the rooms. By the way, you too can contribute.

Friday, March 26, 2010

5 days without blog

March 21: I decided to skip blog and study intensive. It felt more than satisfactory at the end of the day. I had achieved more than what was set ought to be.

March 22: I set what I could never achieve. Pointlessly but I tried.

March 23: I tried to make up for the previous day besides another un-do-able task. S**t!!! 5 hours of sleep. Mission, though, accomplished.

March 24: I tried to lessen my burden but couldn’t lessen my anxiety. So, I pushed harder and ended up with bloated eyes, muddled brain and aching body parts. 3 hours of sleep.

March 25: Doooooooode, you shouldn’t be reading this. Anyway, I decided not to study at all. Instead, I was on my way to HP service centre when I almost escaped a partial mental breakdown. I felt like I was going into coma. I skipped all jobs set for the day and turned towards home.
     I didn’t share with my family what I was going through and slept, switching off my mobile, for 3 hours. In the evening, talked to Kamlesh….relieving words by him, and then followed IPL 3 on Max. Good clashes, both of them. God had to win….SACH a player.

March 26: I am fine today. Studied mild in the morning but you must go back to your work now. I got to study again.

Good bye and do pray that I succeed, harmlessly. Thanks in advance. Love you all. 

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Malawati or Tabadlawati???

Hmmm….seems someone is knee-deep in the water. But thanks to her bulkiness, she manages to foot-stand firmly. The stalwart water-force (read Bee-Jay-Pee, Shame-aaj-bhi Party, Jabardast Development United*) that gushed out to shred the foolishly-strung, a-thousand-a-bead GARLAND was force-ceased (read House Adjourned). All efforts in vain, unyielding.

But it didn’t end there. Mr. Bee-Jay, the blue-eyed boy of Malawati, as The Hindu dated March 19 reads, was in charge of publicity.....oops, backfired and burned his hive. He was immediately handed over to the Medical and Health Department. As is the name, the place assigned. Well, he is not alone in this pervert, psychotic and bee-zarre transfer of duties. Needless to mention, this transfer is neither the first nor the last of Uththal-Puththal Pradesh.....it is a seasonal phenomena and every officer bequeaths his/her fate to it.

So, all this series of unfortunate (because public comes to know their representatives well)/fortunate (because public dethrones their representatives equally well) events pushes to just one MORALE of the story.....Kabhi Happy Kabhi Garam, Agle Election Mei Dekh Lenge Hum.

*Lots of love, keep it up and Good Luck!!!

Friday, March 19, 2010

A religion ignored by humans

One of the greatest diseases is to be nobody to anybody. It was very well pronounced by Mother Teresa but equally denounced by you. So, let me introduce you to yourself. You are good natured, well-settled and prosperous, and yet you are miserable, fractional and feel underprivileged.

It is human nature and this is how it works except few people you might have heard of but you ignored them too. I am no exception. Humanity hasn’t a say in today’s cut-throat competition, germinated in our own minds and planted by our own hands. We are the victim of our own thoughts and we can do nothing but go with the flow.

Well, let me get straight to the point. Recently when I was going through an essay book, I found a topic “Humanity vs. Religion”. I had little idea but that was not adequate. I was deeply troubled, so I googled. Guess what I found? Religion of Humanity (see for yourself).

The earliest use of the term “Industrial Revolution” has been found in a letter written in 1799 by French envoy Otto. The Temple of Humanity, surprisingly, was created in Brazil in 1897. I bet you know more about the revolution than this temple. August Comte, the creator of this religion is way behind HIT-LAR, the greatest slayer of the 20th century. Hey, I think Lad-N missed the league by just 9 months and 11 days. By the way, N here refers to Nuclear.

ooo boy…..I shouldn’t be troubling you more. Go on with your own assignments and reach the pinnacle before you start to feel like converting into another Comte. He didn’t succeed but you definitely will. Good luck!!!

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

New Clear Lie Ability Bill

Compensation is indeed needed and so is needed this 'Lie Ability' bill but not when the victim loses all his ability. As cherry on the top, the operator (NPSeaIL for the time being) has 10 years until claim!!! Are you crazy?
‘A deeply flawed bill’ is well suggested by Mr. Editor (refer The Hindu dated March 16, 2010). Marred by inadequate compensation, lingering trial of the culprit and always an option for the designers and suppliers of the facility to stay off the hook. Now after the hammering fart, the latter might say to the former two IDIOTs, “I didn’t do it, Raju”. Amazing, huh!!!
Well, the third BUNCH of IDIOTS will howl and pelt ice blocks in front of the Ice-Picker. You better go through the article.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Haan-ji-pur, all set to re-establish RAM raaj

A suggested modification in the much-talked-about bill shall restore the traditional We-men constituencies. Nevertheless, it shall empower women too. DUAL MEMBERSHIP, what a brainchild!!! Jab ek se nahi sambhal paaya, introduce two. Hey Incubator, if you are reading it please accept my appraisal for the-only-fine idea that hitherto came to your mind.
Say the elected representatives are one from Bee-Jay-Pee and another from Con-grace. Mind-blowing, huh!!! Power to the people reinstated. Now, who can stop the I-am-the-real-public-servant competition and hence, the overall development of the region? But on the other hand if both are from the SHAME party, the misdirected flow of revenue shall be jet-fast. The latter seems to be a bitter consequence than the better former.
Wonder if the beautiful wives (which shall be the case of Haan-ji-pur) come forward and ask you for both the votes. You might forget all the pain for the-truly-yours (voting) moment and then bang your head for 5 years against her poster wherein she posed hand-folded asking for your vote and which shall now express “I am sorry dude....please forgive me”. Sir Incubator, aapki toh nikal padi. None’s more than beautiful than yours. By the way, HIT-LAR (maaro-laro) had done the same thing. Killed many to save his own land. Killing isn’t the intent in the present case, rather it is sacrificing. How modest!!!
I am not a political expert, hence I won’t continue on it. Just that this idea came to my mind, I thought I must share it. Sorry for launching it up here……really sorry.
PS: A kind request to all (M)ess-Null parties, replace your LOSER SUPREMO, if any. Soldier may lose many battles but the King loses it once and for ever.

Monday, March 15, 2010

CATastrophe revisited......

'I Eye Emma' is the much-talked-about praani these days. Chat box, face-bhukh, tweet-her….aah, lots of mushrooming places. Characterized by unfair, irrational and confused behavior and approach, the members of this species have planned to swing talwaar against each other and end all respect they have earned so far.

1. Why did you not get any calls? Do you have any idea?
2. Did you think we are bound to call if you score this high?
3. Why are you trying to fool us that you studied sincerely in an engineering college? We know all about it, hence we have a reason.
4. Why do you want to quit your job? Do you guarantee you won’t prepare for Civil Services after the degree from our college?
5. How much has Tea-Sea-Ass paid you so far? Do you think you can pay tuition fee on your own? We definitely do not want to burden your parents anymore.
6. Why should we not burden those parents whose wards are simple graduates and could not get placed?
7. Why did you not score even better (around 99% maybe) in your secondary and senior secondary? Didn’t you dream about escalating criterias?

A friend Rajnish who got 99.5 %ile OA and 93+ %ile in each section has been greeted with the most surprising gift one can ever get. This never-before-seen score card, which resembles unseen passages of the C’mon Admission Taste initiative by Promo-trick does not contain any ‘I Eye Emma’ calls. There is a long list of unasked questions at the end of the passage….oops, score card.If you think you are capable of answering these questions, write the Taste next time. It will be PEPPER-based again. You don’t need to bring pencil, rather sit calm in front of your Pee-Sea like you did this time. Good luck!!!


aur haan, In-Daur toh kabhi mat sochna…..they are way ahead in the race. Cosy-Code will catch up soon. Pagal-khane tu jayega nahi aur Luck-now tera bahut kharab hai. You can expect ABC. Chal bahut hua, don’t SEE-LONG.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

BIHAR, it’s time. Gear up!!!

Do you want to know what real progress is? Have you ever thought of returning back home in time, cutting through the crawling traffic, so you could share some moments of togetherness with your family? Have you prayed at least once for the victims of flood?

I know you have but who cares. You may end up banging your head against the wall and praying for some temporary happiness. But what I feel is you can actually bring permanency to this almost-utopian-for-Bihar wish.

You might also want to figure out what it is to breathe in free air, work hassle-free for some cause, raise your voice against corruption, and laugh with your friends as much as you want and night-out as long as you want.

Let the most-democratic-so-far be serving you for another 10 years. You might even forget those 15 years of oppression, extortion, fear and what not.

PS: Save a CL for the voting day in your constituency.

Saturday, March 6, 2010


April 15, 2015

New Delhi: A nursery student has filed a RTI seeking information on the methodology used in calculating his score and percentile in the end semester exams. When his parents asked the Principal, they were informed that Psychometric equivalence system was adopted due to the difference in the difficulty level of the exam papers. The online exam was held from March 12 to March 25 because the strength of the class had gone up from 50 to 95.

One of the faculty members said,’ In the English paper held on March 12, 13 and 14, only the spelling of the domestic animals were asked while on the other 3 days for this paper, the students were asked to identify the animals from a given set of pictures. So we suggested the exam be conducted in alignment with the Standards for Educational and Psychological Testing.’ The said standard was for the first time used in CAT 2009 exam and is supposed to be extended to almost every exam in the country including the recruitment exams. Due to this practice, almost every day an exam is conducted resulting in an increase in employment. Many who haven’t passed secondary school have been recruited as invigilators.

‘This method has brought a revolution in our country. Although the students taking the exam are mostly dissatisfied, we cannot and must not ignore the fact that it has given employment opportunity to many people which remains to be our major concern and priority’, Mr. XYZ said.